Empathetic Leadership: A Checklist for Leaders

Long thought of as a soft skill, empathy is more critical than ever for leadership success. Yet, I still see C-suite executives discounting the value of empathy in the workplace, fearing it will make them appear soft and failing to see how it fits into their business strategy.

Here’s the thing - empathy in the workplace is a revenue booster. Empathy can indeed drive ROI in your profit centers.

Empathy boosts retention, increases engagement, and positively impacts productivity. Who wouldn’t want that?

But it is not enough to recognize this to be true. To leverage empathy as a profit driven vertical in your work culture, you must define it. If you don’t define it, you will not be able to recognize either its existence or the absence of it.

Webster offers a definition, - “The ability to understand and share the feelings of another.”  But to activate and truly live out this definition in your workplace, it is helpful to quantify it for your work culture.

I use the word, “quantify” loosely because it typically assigns numbers to it. Empathy is something that is witnessed, felt, observed, or given.

But I hear you, “Pam, how do I quantify it if I can’t measure it? “

And, the next question I get it, “How do I access it? Where do I find it to activate it within the workplace?”

Tony Robbins once said, success leaves clues. Likewise, I’d suggest that the path to empathy leaves breadcrumbs.

Or more specifically “heart crumbs.” I created that term because empathy resides in the heart. Therefore, my premise is if we have heart, we are equipped with empathy. But we need to tap into it and flex it like a muscle to activate and nurture it.

So, how DO you measure empathy? I offer this checklist to get you started.

If you want a deeper dive into how you can elevate empathy in your work culture or leadership skills, let’s chat.

Empathy Leadership: A Checklist for Leaders

This checklist provides clues and can be used to determine the presence or absence of empathy. Even if you don’t know how to see it yet - recognizing the absence of something can be a way to begin our discovery process. A good place to begin is to sit quietly and remind yourself of the adage, “do unto others as you want done to yourself.”

1 Empathy for Self - We can’t give what we don’t have. To have empathy for others, we must first have empathy for ourselves. True empathy is unconditional which requires the absence of judgement. It cannot thrive in an environment filled with the presence of judgement of self or saturated with an atmosphere of judgement of others.

2 Language - Zero in on the language you use. Are your conversations filtered with words like “we” or “me” and “I”? Something as small as these words can offer tremendous clues to shed light on just how empathetic you may be as a leader. “We-Driven Cultures” are inherently infused with empathy. Likewise, leading from an “I-focused” perspective or even a “you” management style where the accountability is palpable like a pointed finger of disdain and disappointment are often void of empathy.

3 Listening Skills - How do you listen? Do you consider yourself an active, engaged listener? Or would you put yourself in the category of distracted and distant when it comes to listening? Empathy is driven by an active presence which requires showing up fully with full-powered listening.

4 Voice - Empathetic leaders create work cultures where every voice counts. What’s the cadence of others speaking within your teams? Do you welcome and allow others to speak freely? Do you cut them off before they can complete a sentence?

5 Body Language - Empathy is an embodiment. It is felt as it is received, but it is also embodied when it is given. Others will notice your level of empathy from their interactions with you. Actively model it so that it is adopted as one would adopt other positive behaviors. It shows up in facial expressions, body posture and eye contact. Check in with yourself - Does my body language send out a signal that I am empathetic and open to receiving it from others? Are you receptive to demonstrated feelings?

6 Curiosity - Curiosity is the core accessory for empathy. When we seek to understand others - which is the basis for empathy - we must lead with curiosity. How do you respond to the questions of others? If you get defensive when others ask questions, chances are you have not activated curiosity as a superpower to fuel your empathy.

7 People First Strategy - As I indicated in my opening, empathy does fuel profits. However, profit-first strategies may not have the necessary elements to nurture empathy in the workplace. Leading with a people-first philosophy will safeguard the presence of empathy.

8 Contagion -How would you label the energy behind the contagion that pervades your workplace? If the work culture is positive in nature, it is likely that your work culture leans more towards the empathy arena. If it is negative or all-out toxic, the contagion that has invaded your workplace may have hijacked all presence of empathy that once existed.

9 Elevated Empathy - Where does empathy reside in the goals and objectives for performance? If it is not celebrated, admired, revered, or rewarded, no one will focus on it much less care. Examine where it resides in the hierarchy.

10 Decision Driven - The best way to measure empathy in the workplace is to decide to do so. It really can be that simple. I know this to be true and so do you. Don’t believe me? I’ll leave you with this analogy - Have you ever decided to buy a particular car and suddenly that is the only car that jumps out in your sight view in traffic?

Our perceptions change when we decide. Decide to elevate empathy as part of your business strategy and watch what shows up!